Saturday, we released Sherry from her capture. She was released in the fresh sea breeze, on a green hill looking out to Catalina Island. We reme
mbered and shared, and the clouds of the marine layer were broken up by sunshine. We sang, “This Little Light of Mine”, as Sherry’s light brightened even the darkest day, and continues to support us when we feel her light-like presence with us. We also sang, “Amazing Grace”. When we left, families with children flew kites in the light wind.
“Ashes to ashes, dust to dust”. This is how Sherry spoke of her wishes. Years back, she talked about wanting her ashes scattered under the Delicate Arch in Arches National Park in Utah. More recently, she talked about having them scattered in Cambria, one of her favorite places, and where we vacationed three times. Finally, she said, it didn’t matter so much to her, just “not in the water”! The spot I finally chose had multiple connections for us. It’s beautiful, and it is at the beginning of a story that had much meaning for us a year ago at Christmastime.
Saturday was Holy Saturday in the Christian calendar. We experienced Jesus’ death on Good Friday; we commemorated Jesus burial in the Tomb. But now we are in Easter, when all is made new. Saturday was also when Michelle and Vero celebrated Passover with their family. As you all know, Sherry was not much into liturgical calendars. She cared deeply about others, and for all of creation. And she was sure at the end that heaven awaited her.
In planning for Saturday, I remembered the small box that I had found last November. Sherry had shared it with me before, and we put some of the contents up on one of the small kitchen shelves. The box said “fragile” and held her vase collection. It included some miniature vases, tiny cups and saucers, ceramic baby booty, and other small ceramic objects. The collection was from her childhood and youth, and was something she cherished.
I brought the box with me, and as it came time to close our sharing, I pulled out the expertly wrapped tiny objects, and begin handing them out around our circle. Halfway through I panicked, as I suddenly thought there weren’t enough for all. But I put my hand in again, and there were more than enough. Each gift seemed somewhat appropriate to the receiver.
I also received a cherished gift this spring. In a wonderfully connected moment, Sr. Martha Ann gave me the sculpture of St. Joseph walking, called “St. Joseph on the Journey.” One of the other Sisters, Sr. Madeleva, shared with me that St. Joseph is the saint of travelers. I have learned so much from the Communities of St. Joseph, both of Orange, and Carondolet, and they have been with me at significant points in my life. I am grateful to them, as they continue to be with me on my journey. I also have developed deep friendships with others who were “co-ministers” with the Sisters. In my upcoming travels, I plan to see some of these dear friends.
Each day, it seems another door of opportunity for “travel” emerges. I will share more about these opportunities in the coming weeks.
Sherry’s life with us continues as we remember her. May we be as compassionate, fun, quirky, sensitive and thoughtful as she was. May we be as loving a friend, a partner, or spouse. May we be as good a person as she wanted to be, and was. We are surely recipients of God’s grace each day we have to be in relationship with one another.
April 5, 2010 at 7:10 pm
Carolyn, thank you for sharing your experience,it moves me beyond the inadequacy of my words. At our earthly journey’s end, what can we hope for? To have loved and to be remembered in Love. Thank you for sharing this precious little glimple from the universe that you shared with Sherry.
With love,
~liz
April 5, 2010 at 7:22 pm
Carolyn,
Thank you so much for sharing your most private moments with your dear friends. Sherry is so fortunate to have lived and been loved by you and so many people.
Thank you for sharing!
Love,
Tricia
April 6, 2010 at 10:23 am
Carolyn, Thank you for opening up this experience and allowing me to visit with you, Sherry, and your friends. I still miss you here at SJHS. It would have been fun to live through these months of the reform rollercoaster with you–and the years yet to come on that whiplash special. You are much in my heart and mind. Peace, Jack
April 9, 2010 at 2:06 pm
What a beautiful ceremony in Sherry’s honor, Carolyn. I know you chose the site as a very special place for Sherry, but also for you.
So yesterday, when I was in Long Beach at Bill’s house, I asked if he knew where the Korean bell was. So we drove out to the hillside overlooking the ocean on the most incredible day ever. (I felt as though I could touch Catalina!) So being in that space which I know means so very much to you was a powerful experience.
I know you miss Sherry and continue to grieve. Please know you are in my prayers and I hope that the warm and delightful memories that you carry in your heart will give you some comfort.
Hope to get up to Eagle Rock to visit some day soon.
Love,
Mary Ann